Here it 'tis, in it's entirety (also available in TXT, HTML et cetera...) Network Working Group A. Pendragon Internet-Draft Camelot Updates: 8140 (if approved) March 23, 2018 Intended status: InformationalExpires: September 24, 2018 The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch draft-camelot-holy-grenade-00 Abstract The menagerie of beasts and artefacts depicted in RFC8140 may be usefully supplemented by other renowned figures of Internet and more general lore. This document extends the menagerie to the seminal fable of the "Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch", as depicted in the Monty Python film "Monty Python and the Holy Grail", as well as "Spamalot", the musical inspired by the movie. Spamalot The relevance of the musical "Spamalot" to Internet lore should be obvious to the reader; but in case of doubt, see also Section 1 ("What is Spam*?") of RFC2635. Status of This Memo This Internet-Draft is submitted in full conformance with the provisions of BCP 78 and BCP 79. Internet-Drafts are working documents of the Internet Engineering Task Force (IETF). Note that other groups may also distribute working documents as Internet-Drafts. The list of current Internet-Drafts is at https://datatracker.ietf.org/drafts/current/. Internet-Drafts are draft documents valid for a maximum of six months and may be updated, replaced, or obsoleted by other documents at any time. It is inappropriate to use Internet-Drafts as reference material or to cite them other than as "work in progress." This Internet-Draft will expire on September 24, 2018. Copyright Notice Copyright (c) 2018 IETF Trust and the persons identified as the document authors. All rights reserved. This document is subject to BCP 78 and the IETF Trust's Legal Provisions Relating to IETF Documents (https://trustee.ietf.org/license-info) in effect on the date of publication of this document. Please review these documents carefully, as they describe your rights and restrictions with respect to this document. Table of Contents 1. Terminology 2. Introduction 3. The French-occupied castle 4. The Mythos of Caerbannog 4.1. The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog 4.2. Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch 5. Dramatis Personae 5.1. Past the Killer Rabbit 6. IANA Considerations 7. Security Considerations 8. References 8.1. Normative References 8.2. Informative References Index Author's AddressTerminology The key words "MUST", "MUST NOT", "REQUIRED", "SHALL", "SHALL NOT", "SHOULD", "SHOULD NOT", "RECOMMENDED", "NOT RECOMMENDED", "MAY", and "OPTIONAL" in this document are to be interpreted as described in BCP 14 when, and only when, they appear in all capitals, as shown here. Introduction refers to the intended move of RFC formatting to XML2RFC v3 , in the following terms: Although the RFC Editor has recently dragged the IETF kicking and screaming into the twentieth century , there is a yearning among all right-thinking Internet architects to "keep it simple" and to return to the olden days when pigs could be given thrust without anyone taking undue offence. -- A. Farrel While no pigs, flying or otherwise, are involved in the transition to RFC XML v3, it is opportune to enhance the legendarium in the service of RFC XML v3, by illustrating its functionality through references to the mythology of Camelot, and particularly the incidents at the Cave of Caerbannog. The screaming move into the twenty-first century is accompanied by a move back to the late twentieth century, with ASCII stylings more wonted in haunts like ftp://ftp.wwa.com/pub/Scarecrow (known to be accessible in 1996.) There are two references to rabbits in Monty Python and the Holy Grail which are expounded on herewith: Trojan Rabbit In their siege of the French-occupied castle which may already contain an instance of the Grail, Sir Bedevere the Wise proposes to use a Trojan Rabbit to infiltrate the castle, with a raiding party to take the French "not only by surprise, but totally unarmed." The proposal, unsurprisingly, proved abortive. The more so as the raiding party forgot to hide within the Trojan Rabbit, before the French soldiers took the Trojan Rabbit inside the castle.Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog Guarding the entrance to the Cave of Caerbannog; see Section 4.The French-occupied castle The participants of that renowned exercise in cross-cultural communication, to wit the exchange between the Knights of the Round Table and the taunting French soldiers serving under Guy de Lombard are, properly speaking, outside the scope of this menagerie, being more or less human. Notwithstanding, several^ish^ beasts both animated and wooden played a significant part in this encounter; most notably: The Projectile Cow, see Figure 1 The Trojan Rabbit, see Figure 2.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.--.-. ..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-…-.-.--..-.-.-.-.-.-..--.- ,..,.,.,.,.,..,.,,..,.,.,.,.,.,, ^^ .,,.,., ^^ .,.,.,.= >-.-.-.-.>>>.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. \ .,.,. /// .-.-.-.-. .,.,.,.,..,.,..,.,.,..,.,.,,..,., ___/ / .,.,.,., .,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,..,,..,,.,.,.,.,. # .,.,.,. .-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.--.-.-. .-.-.-. .-.--.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.--.-.-.,.,., / . ., . . , .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- /M / -.-.,.,..-.-, .-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.--.. /MI LK_ .-.-.-.-.-. .-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- /MILK mil__k ,.,.,..-,- .-,-.-,-.,-.-,-.-.-/-.. // - // .-.p . .-.-. .-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-.-. // ., // .-.-.-.-.-.-.-.- .-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-.-. %_============ .-.-.--.-.-.-.-.- -.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.-. ! ! .,-.-.-,-,--,-.-,- ,--.-.-,--.--.-.,--, .-,-,--.-,--,-.---,-.-, ,-.-.-,-,-.-,-,-.--, + > .-,--,-.--,-,-.-.-,--,- ,--.-,--,-,--.---,- .-,-,--.--,--,-.---,-,-.-. .,.,.,.,..,.,.,.{A .,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,..,., .,.,.,.,.,.,.{GLASS .,..,.,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,.,.,.,..,.,.,. ,..,.,,.,,.,{OF|MILK..,.,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,.,.,..,.,.,.,.,.,. ,.,..,.,,.,{ISWORTH},.,.,..,.,.,.,.,..,..,.,.,..,.,.,.,.,.,. .,.,.,.,.{EVERYTNG}.-.-.--..-.-.-.-.--..--.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-. -.-.-.-{FORINFANTS}-----___--(0~`~.,.,.,.,> -__-{BUTBETTER}-.-,-,-,-,-,-,-,-,.-^^^^.-.-.-.-.^^^7>>>,., .....{WITHHONEY}-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.RANDOM(BUSH)SHRUBS>> GRASS_GRASS_GRASS_GRASS_GRASS_SOMEROCKS>GRASS>GRASSPC SOIL_ROOTS_SOIL_SOIL_ROCKS_SOIL_GRASS_GRASS_GRASS_ROCKS CLAY_ROCKS_REBBLES_CLAY_CLAY_CLAY_CLAY_GOLD_CLAY_CLAY>< CLAY_CLAY_SKLETONS_MORESOIL_CLAY_CLAY_CLAY_CLAY_CLAY_VR Figure 1: The Projectile Cow with an accompanying cannon ___ ____ //_ //__ || || | -__||_||__| // --_ // ____ --___ // // -_ // \ @/ o || // ---- _____|| // // //_//__ // //-- --- ____ // // --- ______ // // , . ----- _//_ // ,. --- ____ // .,v --- ___ // __ -- _ || , _______________ //|| |-_ || | |''''''''''| // || | | || ' | | | || | | || | | | || | | || " | | 0 | ___||___ | | || | | | -------- | | ||___ | | | ______ | |- // | | | // | _| // |---|__|__// / | || X | / || X | / /_/ // _/ ----- _/--- ----- -----Figure 2: The Trojan Rabbit with an automatic sliding door While the exchange at the French-occupied castle is one of the more memorable scenes of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the Trojan Rabbit has not reached the same level of cultural resonance as its more murderous counterpart. Reasons for this may include: Less overall screen-time dedicated to the Trojan Rabbit. The Trojan Rabbit as projectile has already been anticipated by the Cow as projectile.The exchange of projectile animals was the beginning of a long-running fruitful relationship between the British and the French peoples, which arguably predates the traditional English enmity with the French. The Mythos of Caerbannog The Cave of Caerbannog has been well-established in the mythology of Camelot (as recounted by Monty Python) as the lair of the Legendary Black Beast of Arrrghhh, more commonly known today as the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog Section 4.1. It is the encounter between the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog and the Knights of the Round Table, armed with the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch (see the following section), that we recount here through monospace font and multiple spaces. 4.1. The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog, that most formidable foe of the Knights and of all that is holy or carrot-like, has been depicted diversely in lay and in song. We venture to say, contra the claim made in Section 4.1 of Ze Vompyre, that the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog truly is the most afeared of all the creatures. Short of sanctified ordnance such as Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, there are few remedies known against its awful lapine powers. The following depiction of the fearsome beast has been sourced from Rabbit-SCII, accompanied by C code that was used in this accurate depiction of the Killer Rabbit: \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ \\\\\^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^\\\\ \\\\\>\\\ \\\\>\\ \\\>\ \\\